March 10, 2010

A Mason update...


It has been a tough 6 weeks with Mason & his doctors.
I have been avoiding pretty much everyone and everything.
I haven't wanted to talk about it, but I guess it's time.

Starts with the GI doc.
He knows Mason is still having issues with his feeds and issues with real food.
But has passed the bucket.
Except the doc he tried to pass us too passed as well.
So we are going to be seeing a GI who no longer wants to deal with Mason's issues.
I love that Doctors egos can be so high...
Just because he can't figure it out, he's lost all interest.
We will be begging a GI from Toronto Sick Kids who has just come to Vancouver to take him on. He specializes in children who have feeding tubes.
Apparently, you can't stay healthy just eating formula your whole life.

Seeing the Neuro was a day that I lost all control of my emotions.
He didn't seem to care about the issues with Mason.
He didn't think he was all that bad.
"He's so good compared to other children with the same issues."
Okay, I know he doesn't have Down Syndrome, or CP...
So what do you want me to do?
The Neuro said, "He may very well have some neuros issues, but there would be nothing I could do for him. I don't feel warranted to do any tests, we probably won't find anything."
So I am supposed to sit back and let him be?
How does he know that we won't find anything?
How does he know that there is nothing they can do for him?
He said, "it's a GI problem."
GREAT, cause GI says it's a Neuro problem.
So we left as I sobbed in front of everyone in the hospital.

Is it so wrong that I would like to know what is wrong with my son?
Is it so wrong that I would like to know what our future holds?
I never even know what tomorrow brings.
I am tired, so tired.

Why are they all just passing the buck? I am so tired of it all.
We need $150 to get Mason's medical records or we have to wait anther five months to get them.
We have an older Pediatrician who is interested in his case and has some ideas, but he needs all the records. I do not want to wait another five months but we have to.
Who can afford to spend all this money all the time?

Funny that I have been looking into working one day a week doing Respite, when we really need some Respite.

I am so sick to my stomach lately about what to do?
How do I make them understand?
Or do they understand and their egos are so big that they pass?
If they say he needs therapy why doesn't he just get therapy?
Why do we have to wait another 18 months to get only some?

I am heart broken for Mason.
I wish I could do more, but all I can do is all I can do.

1 comment:

  1. I pray that you find the right Dr for Mason. One that is willing to work as a team with another Dr if needed to help Mason. I think sometimes Dr's think they can do anything so when they can't figure something out they just shuffle it away so they don't hurt their pride. I pray that you find one in it for the reason of learning and healing. You have the cutest boys and I wish your family the best.